Scared to Death of Hamburger

After good month or so of very strictly following all the rules, I could see results. The pounds were starting to come off, the clothes were getting bigger and I was really happy.

Then one night Jim comes home and tells me that my mom and dad are coming to our house and we're all going out for 2-for-1 burger basket night at the little tavern/restaurant near our house, Skip's Friendly Villiage.

At Skip's, there's a beautiful concoction called the "Stump Burger."

I love this burger.

A lot.

It's a half-pounder, studded with Stump's Hot Olives, covered with a slice of pepperjack and smothered in taco sauce. And it's soooooo good.

But I was in a lather. Sitting at the bar, I was quite literally hyperventilating.

How could I eat an enormous, greasy, cheese-covered hamburger ... on a white bun? With french fries? Would potato chips be better?

If I eat this hamburger, will I get sick? Will I gain back every ounce I already lost? Will I fall off the wagon and return to my old eating habits?

Should I eat the whole thing? Will I be able to stop after half? Will I wake up tomorrow 5 pounds heavier?

I've got myself so whipped up I'm shaking. And sweating. Jim just looks at me and says, "Knock it off. You're fine. It won't kill you."

The burger comes. And I'm still terrified to put it in my mouth. But I do.

And I eat the whole thing. Every last morsel.

I went to bed very worried. What had I done?

But, much to my surprise, the scale was OK the next day. One hamburger hadn't wrecked the whole deal.

And I knew I could eat right today and tomorrow and keep moving toward my goal.

Liberating.

But just in case, I make a fake burger and fries that fills the craving when it's an all-veg day.


Portabello Mushroom Burger and Sweet Potato Fries

Portabello mushroom caps
Jar of pesto
Parmesean cheese, grated
Panko breadcrumbs
Olive oil
Salt & pepper
Whole wheat "Thin Buns"
Sweet potatoes

Preheat oven to 450 degrees. Peel potatoes and slice them into sticks. Drizzle with olive oil and sprinkle with salt and pepper. Place on cookie sheet and bake until they start to brown and are soft enough. Flip them over once so two sides get "crunchy."

Clean the mushroom caps and scrape off the "gills" from the underside. In a small bowl, mix a couple of spoonfuls of the pesto, a little parmesean and some breadcrumbs, so it forms a lumpy paste. Drizzle both sides of the mushroom caps with olive oil and sprinkle with salt and pepper. Throw them, gill side down, on your grill or a grill pan or even a panini maker. Let the underside cook. Then take them off the heat and spread the pesto mixture on the gill side. Put them back on the heat, topside down, to cook the other side.

Toast the buns. Build the burgers, topping with whatever you like.
Note: This is NOT a low fat thing. And if you use too much pesto or too much parm, it's salty. But the fat is mostly heart-healthy olive oil.