Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Hip Bone's Connected to the ...

In the past year, I have developed this weird new habit.

Every morning when I wake up, I run my hand across my hip bone. Well, I guess it's my pelvis, technically, but pelvis is such an unattractive word. You know the part I'm talking about ... the point of your hip that sticks up when you're lying flat on your back.

I do this because I am sort of amazed that I can feel it.

And I do it because I want to make sure it's still there.

It's a good way to start the day.

Tuesday, August 30, 2011

Efficient Exercise

OK, now that we've talked about walking, and how much I love it, it's time to move on.

There's a pattern here, if you haven't noticed. Bike riding was Accidental Exercise ... fun, fast and not so strenuous if you don't want it to be and killer when you do. Walking is Accessible Exercise ... everyone can do it. Can you guess what Efficient Exercise is?

Yup, running.

I love running for many of the same reasons I love walking ... no equipment required, it's just me trying to best myself, it can be done inside or outside. All true.

But I love running mostly because it takes less time than walking! And way less time than biking.

It sounds so simple. But it's so true. When you don't have a lot of time and you want to burn a bunch of calories quickly, running is the only way to go, in my book.

Running can be a nice, slow jog. You can turn up the speed or the incline when you're ready. You can run for as long as your lungs allow, then slow down to a walk, and fire back up when you've caught your breath. It's just infinitely adjustable. Customizeable, if you will.

And I really love the end of the run. When I'm gasping for breath, a sheen of sweat covering every square inch of me, with more running down my legs. My muscles are snapping and popping and bursting with life and I feel invincible.

And I'm not going to lie. It's also so much fun to slip things like this in conversation, "I ran X miles yesterday."

Monday, August 29, 2011

Accessible Exercise

On my way to work, I listen to Bob and Tom on the radio. I figure the day is going to be long and painful enough ... I might as well kick it off with a smile and giggle or two. No matter how low-brown sometimes.

The other day, a comedian was talking about getting in shape. Bob (or Tom or Chick or Kristie?) asked him what he was doing by way of exercise. He said he was walking.

You know, just walking. You can walk anywhere. When he travels, he can walk. When he's home, he can walk. And then he delightfully compared himself to white-haired old men with high socks, higher waistlines on sansabelt pants and mall walkers.

I laughed. But then I kind of felt bad for "Walking." Sometimes I think it gets a bad rap.

It's not exciting. It's not glamorous. It seems to me that "runners" snicker a little at it because it's not quite as cool. And occasionally I find myself almost apologizing for it.

But why? Walking is nearly perfect. You CAN do it anywhere. There's no equipment required and no membership to pay for. No matter what fitness level you're at, you can do it. You can adjust pace and distance as you're able. It's not hard on your body. You can do it for the rest of your life.

Best of all, in 40 minutes you can get a good workout and burn a decent amount of calories.

So hold your head high and hit the road. And if you have to do it in the mall, go right ahead. Pick up something cute for me while you're there.

Sunday, August 28, 2011

Personal Best

Six running miles Saturday morning. In a row. Along with 1.25 of walking.

And guess what?

It was almost "enough."

I was toying with the idea of joining some friends in the pursuit of the half marathon in February. But I think I'm over it.

Not sure I will have a real desire to go that far. And I kind of feel badly or guilty about that. I feel like I should WANT to keep running farther. I should want to continue to set goals and reach for them. I should want to push myself.

But, I don't.

I'm not sure if it's because I feel like I've climbed my mountain already. Or if it's because I'm just too lazy and tired to think about it right now. Or maybe I'm just content where I am.

And maybe I'll change my mind after the 10K with the 1.2-mile-long climb ... if the endorphins kick in and propel me toward a new summit.

However, I doubt it. So, in light of all of that, I think I might change my goals to be something more along with lines of "things I can do in my new body that were out of the question before."

Like, get on The Amazing Race.

P.S. 5K/10K update: I have ONE person officially joining me. I'll call her TrekFreak. She's going to do the 5K. No one else feels like they can go 3.3 miles on foot? Let's do it!

Friday, August 26, 2011

No Regrets

I set my alarm for 5 a.m. today, to make sure I had enough time to get a decent workout in before clocking in for an early meeting.

The buzzer buzzed, I crawled out of bed, weighed myself and crawled back in bed. The number was good and I was tired.

I started to go through the traditional rationalizations:
  • Yeah, I worked out every day this week -- fairly hard -- so I can skip today.
  • Yeah, I'll be able to exercise every day this weekend, so I can skip today.
  • Yeah, I think my eating will be OK during the weekend, so I can skip today.
And then I thought about how I might feel later if I stayed in bed.

There's a good chance I might feel badly if I don't haul my hind end out of bed. But I'll never regret going down there and hitting the treadmill.

So I went. (Your MIND is the most powerful muscle, remember!)

Thursday, August 25, 2011

River to Ridge ... You In?

There's a 5K/10K run in Janesville on Sept. 24.

How about we go as a team? I'm thinking about trying the 10K. My training time between now and then is limited, but I think I might be able to do it. If not, I'll do the 5K.

Walk, run, do a bit of both. It's just fun to have a goal.

What do you say? Respond with which race you'd like to do. (And if you're up for the half-marathon, more power to you!)

http://www.rivertoridgehalfmarathon.com/home.asp


Wednesday, August 24, 2011

Carrie Fisher Lost 50 Pounds ...

And she's on the front page of CNN.com.

Lucky bi-atch.

What's That? More Favorite Things?

1. Laughing Cow Light cheese wedges ... Original, Bleu and Queso Fresco y Chipotle flavors
2. Whole wheat pita pockets
3. Crystal Light (or store brand) White Grape flavored water add-in
4. Champion-brand (from Target) no cotton workout socks
5. Workout shorts or shirts with a pocket for your phone ... great for bike riding

Tuesday, August 23, 2011

Pizzeria Grilled Chicken

OK, this isn't really pizza at all. But when it hits the grill, it SMELLS like a pizzeria. It's a perfect summer supper with corn on the cob or moz/tomato/basil salad. Or both!

Pizzeria Grilled Chicken

Chicken breasts or skinless, boneless thighs
Olive oil
Garlic salt
Dried basil
Dried oregano
Dried minced onion
Salt and pepper
Chopped garlic (I usually have a jar in the fridge, and don't chop my own)

A few hours before you plan on grilling, smear enough olive oil on the chicken to allow the herbs to stick. I cover the chicken ... it's all green ... in whatever proportions you want. (Mo' garlic, mo' betta!) I don't think this can turn out badly, no matter what you do. Put the chicken in a Ziploc or in a glass dish in the fridge until it's time to grill. I like to let the chicken warm up on the counter 30 minutes or so before it goes on the heat.

Grill. Sniff. Enjoy!

Monday, August 22, 2011

Summer Snackin'

What's a girl to do when she's out on the town on a summer Sunday for an afternoon of shopping and running errands ... and she gets hungry?

HUNGRY hungry. Stomach-growling hungry. I-want-to-eat-right-now-and-I'm-in-the-middle-of-fast-food-alley-with-nothing-but bad-choices-hungry.

She stops at the fresh produce stand and picks up a half dozen ears of sweet corn for supper AND a pint of blueberries for the ride home.

You always have choices!

Sunday, August 21, 2011

Traffic Jam

I love that this is what constitutes a traffic jam on a sunny, Sunday morning in my lovely country neighborhood:

  • A man on a buckskin gelding
  • Me on my Gary Fisher
  • A couple in a silver German convertible
  • A barking dog
  • A gray-haired man in a Buick sedan

We all slowed down to make sure the crossing could be made safely ... except the older man in the Buick sedan. He just sort of plowed right though.

Dirty Girls Before and After




Saturday, August 20, 2011

5K, Schmive K!

I'm happy to report that my first 5K is done and I survived. Truth be told, I'm doubting that it was an actual 5K ... it just didn't seem far enough or take long enough to be 3.3 miles. Some areas were too muddy to actually run, so I can't really say I "ran" a 5K. But even with the really uneven surface, the hilly terrain, and the obstacles, I am also fairly confident that I CAN run a 5K.

So now I have to find another one to see if I'm right.

And then, maybe try a 10K.

(Thanks Jana and Maria for running along with me and thanks to Judy, Dave and Jim ... who all waited patiently for us to finish!)

One Thing Leads to Another

Have you seen the TV commercial for some diet something that shows the same woman on a split screen, where on one side  she eats a salad and gets some exercise and, we assume, gets thinner and on the other side, she eats a donut, then some french fries and then sits on the couch? And, we assume, gets fatter. It opens with the line, "One good choice can lead to another."

I believe this. In fact, I have proof.

On the same note, I saw a story on CNN.com and it was re-reported on Channel 27 this morning about how you can "train your brain" to crave healthy foods. The point is that bad foods are a habit, and the more you eat them, the more you want them. If you replace them with fruits and veggies, your brain will eventually start to crave the good stuff.

I also believe this. And, again, I am my own living proof.

My problem right now is that I've gotten lazy in my eating because I've discovered I can. I'm still fluctuating on those last 10 pounds. I know WHY. It's the candy at work. It's the lunch meetings when they bring in sandwiches with crusty white rolls and ham ... and I gobble them up. It's the non-stop, stress-related feeding frenzy I'm on when I get home from work ... complete with ice cream on more occasions than I should admit.

It's time to retrain my own brain. It's time to pile up a few better decisions in a row. It's also time to remind myself that this is an every day, for the rest of my life CHOICE, not punishment. The rewards have been and are worth devoting some effort to.

Friday, August 19, 2011

Do I Work Out Before the 5K?

Part of me thinks I should get up and work out like normal tomorrow and then go to the mud run. I mean, it's not like they even use a stopwatch at the run ... I can walk the whole thing and go around the obstacles I don't like, afterall.

I'm not really planning to bust my ass, either. Is that wrong? I just think it's going to be fun and funny.

So then the other part of me thinks I'm underestimating what it's going to take.

I guess I'll know which part of me was right about 2:30 tomorrow afternoon.

(And just to be sure, I got my 5-mile run in this morning ... just in case I hurt myself or can't do my normal stuff on Sunday!)

Thursday, August 18, 2011

Preparation DG

List of things to remember for my first-ever 5K:

Duct tape ... check.
Old bed sheet ... check.
Toothbrush ... check.
Fingernail clippers ... check.
And, of course, wet wipes ... check.

Jana, Maria and I are attempting the Dirty Girl Mud Run on Saturday. That's a 5K, in the mud, with 11 obstacles. We're going to climb an 8-foot wall, hurdle ourselves over big bales, stacked three or four high, climb a slippery-muddy cargo net and more.

We'll be doing this with 5,997 other women. Which I find amazing.

It's going to be so much fun. And we're going to laugh a lot. And then drink a lot, I hope.

P.S. The duct tape is for your shoes, so they stay on. The bed sheet is for your car ... while we'll hose down there, I'm sure there will still be dirt. The toothbrush and fingernail clippers (little file part) are to get the mud out of the obvious places. And the wet wipes are for the camera ... so I can take photos to post here!

Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Bad Salad

There are no good groceries in my house right now. And I haven't had time to get to the store to replenish. So I made a dinner salad tonight with what I had on hand. If you can avoid this combination, do so at all costs:

Spring Mix lettuce
Carrots
Tomatoes
Pepperochini
Feta
Cottage cheese
Slivered almonds
Dried cranberries

It sounds gross, right? So why would I put them together in the first place?
  1. I had very small amounts of each, so I used every "fresh," salad-y thing I had to make an overall serving big enough to fill my belly. 
  2. Sometimes things that sound gross don't actually turn out that way.
  3. I wanted to tidy up the fridge by using all these odds and ends.
Bad plan. And, I should probably tell you this ... I still wasn't full. So I had a Bread and Butter pickle chip chaser. I can already feel the stomach ache coming on.

What's the grossest thing you've ever created or consumed in the spirit of healthy eating?

Tuesday, August 16, 2011

Accidental Exercise

I didn't work out on my treadmill yesterday morning.

It's become, perhaps, a too-frequent Monday morning ritual. Or un-ritual? The weekends have been super busy, I don't get to bed at a reasonable hour Sunday night and then I'm worn out come five bells on Monday a.m. I find myself ignoring my internal clock and catching a few extra Zzzzs before the workweek officially starts.

But when I do this, I feel guilty and sluggish all day. And by the time I get home, my muscles are twitching for want of movement. And my brain is driving me crazy by chastising the rest of my body for being a lazy bones.

So last night, in an effort to make good from the skip, I decided to take a bike ride. My intent was to go around my "block" three times. I had been doing two circuits and figured I could add an extra one as self-imposed punishment.

I found it odd that the sun was high in the sky when I left, and setting when I returned. I guess Fall is coming faster than I want it to, I thought. The days are getting shorter.

And then I looked at the clock when I walked in the house. I had been on my bike for nearly two hours!

How could that be? I only went around the block three times. I must be a slow pedaler. I had the block pegged as about a five mile loop and two hours seemed like a looooooong time to go 15 miles. 

I clocked it on my way home from work tonight. Each loop is approximately 7.75 miles. Yeah. That's 23.5 miles. Twenty-three hilly, windy country miles, to be more descriptive.

Whoops. I guess I got a workout afterall.

Monday, August 15, 2011

Watermelon is Delicious

Crisp. Juicy. Sweet.

Addicting. And it might be triggering gout for Jim. His loss.

'Nuff said.

After yesterday's LOOOOOONG post, I thought you might want a break.

Sunday, August 14, 2011

Sweat Psyche!

I have already told you that I'm a sweater. Sweatee? A person who sweats. A lot. When I get done with my long run for the week, I can literally ring out my workwear.

It's sort of gross. My hair is dripping. Sweat is running down my legs. And I can't wait to jump in the shower.

But I've noticed a head-game that sweat is starting to play on me. And I did some thinking about it today while I was on the treadmill. 

See if you can follow this train of thought:
The more I work, the more I sweat.
If I'm not sweating so much, I must not be working as hard.
If I'm sweating a lot, and working a lot, my workout must be really hard.
If my workout is really hard, I must be getting tired.
If I'm getting tired, I'm not sure I can go ... that extra mile, that faster speed, that higher incline, etc.

I'm sweating a lot. I should probably just be done now.

So today I paid attention to other things ... not just to how much I was sweating. I paid attention to my heart rate. I listened for my breathing. I concentrated on my quads.

And guess what I found?

When I started to talk myself into the fact that I was really running a long distance and that I was sweating a lot and that I must be tired, my form kind of fell apart. I got hunched over. I swung my arms more. And the more uncomfortable running like that got, the more "tired" I became. It felt like more work to run that way.

So when I noticed it happening, I quickly stood up taller. Moved my hands less. Listened to my breathing to see if I was huffing more.

And guess what again? It felt less like work. Yeah, I was still sweating like a farmhand. But my body wasn't really begging me to stop at all. It was fine. It was perfectly capable of going farther.

Yet another example of how your brain is the strongest muscle of them all. And if you let it, it will tell you that you "can't" do all sorts of things. But when the other muscles in your body join together, they are strong enough to overcome your brain and start a revolution.

And, just for fun, here are some sweaty facts, courtesy of my sister and the Dean Health Systems newsletter, or something:


How Sweat Works
Sweat: Your Body’s Cooling System
Sweat is your body's natural method of cooling itself, whether it’s during a tough workout, when you're outdoors in the heat, or in response to over stimulated nerves.

Sweat Facts
  • On average, a person has between 2 and 5 million eccrine and apocrine sweat glands throughout the body
  • Eccrine glands are all over the body, especially on the hands, soles of the feet forehead
  • These glands produce sweat that is 99% water and 1% waste products
  • Eccrine sweat glands remove excess minerals as waste products, such as copper, zinc, lead mercury, nickel and cadmium, sodium, potassium, calcium, urea, ammonia, uric acid, and phosphorus
  • Apocrine glands are found in the armpits and groin and are responsible for removing protein and fatty acids from the body
  • Apocrine glands can also contribute to foul body odor; along with some foods, some medications, and various medical conditions
Sweating is Good for the Body
Often, the more you sweat during a workout, the more efficient your body is at cooling down. Many people associate sweating with a particular level of fitness, but in actuality, your body's cooling system just adjusts to the effort it is accustomed too. For example, an individual who is extremely active and used to keeping the core of the body cool during a bout of exercise will react to the start of exercise by releasing blood to the surface of the body quickly to release heat from the body. This will make the body sweat quicker and often in more quantity than someone who is not accustomed to these body temperature changes.

Some people sweat more than others, even during the same activities. This can be genetic or based on how efficient the body is at cooling from the repetition of various activities. The amount or frequency of sweat is not indicative of a good or bad fitness level.

During exercise or any other part of the day, it is important to avoid dehydration. Drinking too little water can contribute to a decrease in physical performance. It also makes it difficult for the body to properly cool down and remove appropriate wastes. The solution is simple; drink more water.

Hydration Facts
Losing water at a rate of 2-3% body mass can make exercise difficult and decrease performance (ACSM, 2005)
According to the American College of Sports medicine, dehydration can cause negative affects on mood, short term memory, psycho and visual motor skills, and math skills
 
To rehydrate: replace what you sweat out with water back in:
  • Before a workout (1-2 hours) drink at least 16 ounces of water
  • During a workout, drink a few ounces every 15-20 minutes
  • After a workout, maintain fluid consumption at a regular level
You can still lose too much water even if you are drinking during the exercise. To measure water weight loss during exercise, weigh yourself right before your workout and immediately after your workout. Note the difference in weight and record. For every 0.5 pounds lost during a endurance based workout, drink 4 oz. of water to replace the lost fluid.
 
If you lost more than 2% of your body weight, drink more water throughout your workout to maintain hydration and ensure that your body can sweat efficiently. Don't wait until you are thirsty to drink because you are already moving toward dehydration. Consume water throughout the day to promote efficient cooling of the body and maintain hydration.

Remember that sweating is good for the body and that proper fluid consumption can improve performance.
Source: Monica Niska, LiveHealthier Certified Personal Trainer with information compiledMedicine.

Thursday, August 11, 2011

Bike Metaphors, The Sequel

  • On your way uphill, the pedaling is hard. But it almost always get easier just before the peak. So be careful about making decisions about how tough it's going to be to reach the summit from the bottom. You can't really know until you get there and it's almost always not as difficult as it appears to be.
  • You need both the long, slow climbs and the steeper, shorter hills to keep the ride interesting and your blood pumping.
  • Bikes need kickstands. Even fancy bikes.  
  • When you don't like where you're going, look the other way. For instance, if you're riding on the edge of the pavement and you unexpectedly start to drift toward the drop-off between the pavement and the shoulder, look toward the center line. Your bike will follow your eyes. 
  • If you keep your finger on the gear shift, you're way more likely to accidentally punch it. 
  • A regular dose of both whiskey and ice cream won't kill you. In fact, it might be good for you.

(OK, this last one I didn't learn from the bike ride itself. I learned it from my father-in-law. But I was thinking about it as I was pedaling, so that counts, right?)

Wednesday, August 10, 2011

You Can't Out-Exercise Bad Eating

Or, at least, I can't.

The eating is more important. The two go hand-in-hand, no doubt. Exercise is necessary and recommended for any number of reasons, of course.

But eating right, at least most of the time, is the most critical half of this whole for me.

Tuesday, August 9, 2011

I Got Smarter as I Got Skinnier

Have an item stuck in my craw today. Not sure if I should talk about it publicly. So if this is a bit cryptic, I'm sorry.

I work in a corporate environment for a Fortune 500 company. In a perfect world, I am judged on the quality of my work. My success is measured solely by my performance, in objective terms. Did I meet the goals I was given. Did I complete the tasks?

However, you and I both know that those concrete measurements are only part of the story. Much of my progress, my climb up the ladder, so to speak, is determined by the perceptions people have of me.

Have you ever been in a meeting with someone, or reported to someone, or had to work on a project with someone who you can tell just thinks you're kind of dumb? You meet them, talk to them, and they almost dismiss you ... instantly? You can tell they've formed an opinion of you before you even open your mouth.

I learned of a situation today where a person who treated me that way had recently "come around" and now thinks differently of me.

In other words, in this person's perception, I used to be a mediocre performer. And now I am much "better."

Here's what changed: My butt got smaller.

I didn't get smarter. My attitude didn't improve. The quality and quantity of my work didn't get better.

I wish that the world was fair and that we were all judged only on what is in our hearts and in our brains. But the cold hard truth is that the world judges all of us on many other things.

The way we look is one of them.

(And I hope you read this quickly, because I might chicken out and pull this post down.)

Monday, August 8, 2011

I'm Liking This Bike Thing

So many metaphors, so little time:

  • For every tough, slow uphill, there's a easy, fun, fast downhill.
  • When the pedaling gets tough, find another gear.
  • Uphill might be tough, but it's controllable and conquerable ... and even the easy, fun, fast downhill can be totally ruined by an unexpected rock or twig if you hit it just right.
  • Don't forget to pick your eyes up from the front tire and see all the rest that's around you ... it can be breathtaking.
  • Your legs might be a little wobbly and your butt might hurt at the end of the ride, but it was worth it.

Sunday, August 7, 2011

Question of the Day

If chocolate cake has zucchini in it, it's good for you, right?

The woman my husband lovingly refers to as "Ma Govert" brought one over today. I'm hoping the squash cancels out the chocolate chips and walnuts. OMG. It's so yummy.

And did I mention that it was warm and melty when she brought it?

I'm counting it as a veg serving and enjoying every crumb.

You gotta live a little.

Saturday, August 6, 2011

Tips and Tricks

If you're, say, having a party ... and, say, you have a lot of food out ... and, say, you don't want to eat a whole bunch of stuff that's not so good for you ...

It's best to not stand right next to the food.

Physical distance is best.

Friday, August 5, 2011

Friendly

As some of you know, my in-laws are in town and we're lucky to have them staying with us. Tonight, an old friend of theirs drove down from the LaCrosse area for a visit. Dinnertime arrived and we ordered pizza from the little pizza shop in the VERY little town I live near.

It's an adorable place, sharing space with the 2011 version of a general store. There's a mini supermarket (two cans of tomato soup, two cans of chicken noodle, two cans of cream of mushroom ... you get the idea), an ice cream counter, coolers for pop and beer and fresh baked goods. I paid for my pies and pushed my way out the door to my car with one yummy-smelling disc balanced in each palms-up hand.

And then I had a conundrum. How was I going to open my car door with no free hand? Luckily for me, there was a handsome young man sitting in a golf cart nearby, waiting for his friends. He was general-issue, small town Wisconsin ... looked like he just got off from work at a local farm. Jeans, cut off Tshirt, well-worn baseball cap. Tanned and muscled.

I looked over at him, laughed and said, "Would you do me a favor and open my car door?"

"Sure," he smiled and jumped up to come help me.

Then it occurred to me ... my car was locked and my keys were in the front pocket of my shorts. My shorts are of the loose-ish variety.

And I considered my options.

"Nevermind," I said as I explained where my keys were. "I'm friendly. But not quite that friendly." I giggled as I put one pizza down on the hood of the car. The kid laughed and sat back down.

I'm not sure I would have even asked him for help as the old me. I know I wouldn't have made a joke about his hands in my pants. And I know that I wouldn't have seriously considered allowing him to go get those keys because I didn't own a pair of shorts or pants loose enough where he was unlikely to actually cause any damage in the effort.

I'm pretty sure I made the right choice.

Thursday, August 4, 2011

Rico Southwest Turkey Burgers

In light of the ground turkey recall, I thought I'd throw this in there.

(But seriously, check your local news and your freezer ... I think it was Cargill brand that was bad.)

Rico Southwest Turkey Burgers
1 pkg. ground turkey (1.25 lbs.)
1-2 tablespoons minced onion
1-2 tablespoons finely chopped cilantro
1 teaspoon (or more if you like!) finely chopped jalapeno or Serrano
1 tablespoon Tajin Classico Seasoning (a mixture of chili pepper, salt, lime and sold in the produce department of my WalMart ... though I bet the lime flavor of Mrs. Dash or those other herb mixes would work just the same. But if you use a salt-free version, add some salt and pepper in here, too.)
1 avocado, cut in slices
Garden salsa cheese slices or pepperjack cheese slices
Raw onion slices
Tomato slices
Iceberg lettuce leaves
Taco sauce

Mix the ground turkey with minced onion, peppers, cilantro, and Tajin. Make patties and grill. Melt cheese. Serve on wheat buns or Sandwich Thins, topped with avocado, raw onion, tomato and lettuce. Dress with taco sauce ... or salsa if you have it!

Wednesday, August 3, 2011

The Number, Part Deux

My friend HR Girl called today to talk about The Number.
She was worried, I think, that I was obsessing over something irrational.

And I'm not exactly obsessing, for the record. I'm more irritated with myself for just not getting there already.

She asked why The Number was important. Was it important that I hit the 100 mark because 100 has a nice ring to it? Was it important just because I had a number locked in my head? Or was it really the BMI thing?

The answer is that all of those things are true. I want to say I lost 100 pounds. I want to weigh a number I distinctly remember weighing (the number on my first driver's license), and I want my BMI to be in the dead center of normal.

But I also just want to finish the job I set out to do. I want to complete the project. I want to tie up the loose ends and be done with the "losing weight" phase and on to just living life again.

Or do I?

Maybe having those five more pounds to go is a GOOD thing.

Because if I have those five pounds to go, I can't stop doing what I'm doing. I have to get up every morning and hit the treadmill. I have to watch what I eat. I have to constantly monitor and balance what I put in my mouth and how much I move my ass.

Maybe those five pounds will keep me honest. And prevent me from slipping back into old habits and old jeans.

I like those five pounds more today than I did yesterday.

Tuesday, August 2, 2011

The Number

I'm stuck on a number. Well, two numbers.
One is the weight on my scale. The other is my BMI.

The first is just frozen and nothing I do (good or bad) seems to budge it. I just can't seem to drop those last five pounds. The second is in the "normal" range, but still hovering close to the overweight category.

I don't tell everyone what my actual weight is. I don't tell because I really believe that the number isn't important and that we should all focus more on how we feel, how far we've come and how healthy we are. I also don't tell because I don't want you to do the math and figure out how much I did weigh before all this. It still embarrasses me.

But when I see that BMI number, a byproduct of my actual weight, of course, it irritates me.

When I do tell people how much I weigh, they say something like this:

"No way! You look closer to (a number 10 or 15 pounds lighter than I actually am)." Or, "Really? You don't look like you weigh that much."

Both of these comments are meant as compliments. And I happily take them as such. But my number bothers me because it still sounds big. And it still puts me squarely in the "almost overweight" BMI camp.

It sounds ridiculous, or even conceited perhaps, to want more than what I have. The girl inside me that worked so hard to get in a size 6, and sometimes a 4, screams at this whiner. "You bitch! This isn't good enough now?"

But the old big girl sees the big number on the scale and forgets all about the size of the jeans, the miles traveled and the pounds lost. She only sees the flab round the middle and the saddlebags and the arm flaps and yells back. "You only THINK you're thin. You'll NEVER be thin. Not actual skinny. The rolls are still there and everyone can see them."

After 95 pounds, I didn't think five more would be such a big deal. Or that it would mess with my head this much.

Of course I know it's just a number. That I've done a good job and that I'm perfectly OK just where I am. I'm not saying this to fish for compliments or support. I'm just being honest because if I feel like this about my number, I know some of you also worry about your number. It's normal, I guess.

Irritating. Maybe even irrational. But normal.

Monday, August 1, 2011

Unexpected Downside of Being Thinner #12

This is hilarious.
I've been getting ear aches. I've never had ear aches before, so I wasn't even sure that the periodic stabbing feeling in my right ear was what one would call an ear ache. It's not debilitating; it's really more bothersome. But it just won't go away and has even woken me up at night a couple of times. So, I decided it was time to go to the doctor.

And guess what I learned?

Ear aches are a side effect of losing weight. Or can be, I guess.

Something to do with your Eustachian tube and how it's supposed to be closed, and when you're fatter, the fat in your head helps keep it closed. And then when you lose weight, you also lose it in your head and then the tube doesn't have the pressure around it to stay closed and that can cause some weird things. (I might have these details a little goofed up, but that's what I understood. After I learned that it wasn't a big deal, and that my eardrum looked fine and there was no swelling or infection, I didn't care too much about the specifics.)

Ibuprofen for now and see if it goes away.

Who'da thunk it?