I Prefer To Be Topless

There's a benefit to being an empty nester.

KIDDING! I'm totally NOT writing about walking around my house, frying bacon, or lifting weights naked. Eeeeeewwwww! Who does that? (And if you do, don't tell me about it, K?)

I'm talking about BUNS. Hamburger buns.

We had turkey burgers on the grill tonight. Our bun of choice is a Whole Wheat Sandwich Thin, to the tune of about 100 calories.

I've started to skip the top. It's a small calorie cut, but they all add up, right? In other words, I'm topless.

I put my burger on the bottom bun and use leaf or iceberg lettuce as the top bun. You can still hold the dang thing together and I have found that I really don't miss the extra piece of bread.

In fact, I also make my BLTs this way now. Bottom slice of toast, light smear of olive oil mayo, thin slice of tomato, bacon and then a literal 1/2 inch or so of iceberg leaves. Yum!

(For the record/in full disclosure, we skip the Sandwich Thins for BLTs and I buy that junk "whole wheat white" bread. I just can't have a BLT without something that reminds me of gooey Wonder-like bread. And I also use real bacon. I used to use turkey bacon and have decided, after little much hearsay research that real bacon, in moderation, is an OK choice. Real food is better than manufactured and chemicaled food. And, I nuke it in the micro, so again ... no frying in the nude.)

This is where I try to have a charming quote or silly photo to pull this whole post together. I search something like "Topless Burger" and hit "images" and see what happens.

Well, the what happens in that particular search didn't turn up much PG-13 content. (Try it!) So I tried "Shirtless Man Eating Hamburger." That search gave me many unattractive things that would not promote eating burgers. And a few disgusting still frames from the infamous David-Hasselhoff-in-a-drunken-stupor-eating-a-burger video. I often wonder what the CIA thinks when they look at my web history.

Anywhooooo ... then I found this. Not sure who he is, but he might be famous in the UK. And he's totally eating a burger. You're welcome, ladies.