When I was bigger, I dreaded trying on ANYTHING in the dressing room. I hated carrying those big clothes from the women's section. I hated believing they weren't going to look good. I hated fearing that I'd need a bigger size than the one I grabbed off the rack.
I really hated pulling on a pair of pants and knowing, before they hit my hips, that they were going to be too small.
I don't know if you know this feeling.
You can tell when the waistband hits just below your butt cheeks as you're hiking them up.
Even now, there's a bit of that old fear that creeps up every time I try something on. My breath doesn't catch, exactly, but my mind "catches" for the tiniest measurable second. What if they won't fit?
These days, when I slide a pair of pants over my knees and start to pull them up toward my waist, the pants hit the exact same spot below my hips. In that instant, as the waistband slides over the very same point on the back of my legs, I can tell they're going to fit.
Then I exhale. And honestly marvel a little. (I imagine that people who have always been thin don't know this feeling or understand it.)
I can't tell you how good it feels. Makes all the work worth it.
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